damerell

Underworld is by no means the worst movie I have ever seen. Hell, I've seen Manos and Red Zone Cuba in the same night, it's not even on the worst-movie radar. But it's pretty awful, for all, that. There's the awfulness that is actually soul-destroying (like Manos); below that is the awfulness that is jolly and camp (like Space Mutiny, say, or Plan 9); but below that there's the awfulness of mere mediocrity, like you thought you'd put Kate Beckinsale in a shiny black corset and hope no-one would notice the movie stank. That's where Underworld is. It's not just bad; it isn't even bad enough to be good (like Abba).